Eating Problems

Argh!! The only problem I ever seem to have with Toby is food related.

He's never been a big eater, he's not what I'd call a fussy eater, he'll always try new things or retry things he didn't like last time.

It's just some days he just won't eat!

I've learned that if I ask him what he wants for lunch/dinner, if he tells me what he wants and I make it he'll eat most of it, if he replies with 'no' it just means he doesn't want to eat, and even if I make him something he'll just push it round his plate and then say 'finished'.

The dilemma I have is; he's quite a skinny thing, he's constantly on the go and doesn't eat much, so if he doesn't eat his lunch but then asks for an orange or a banana an hour later, I give him it. It's not like he's asking for chocolate or crisps!

Should I start saying ' no you can't, because you didn't eat your lunch/dinner and risk him not eating anything? Or should I give him the fruit because at least it's healthy and it's better than nothing?!

We've just had a stand off at tea time, I asked him what he wanted, he said 'no' so I made him his favourite which is tuna pasta. He had about 3 pieces and then said 'finished' I got a bit upset because he's barely eaten his breakfast or lunch. So the Hubby said 'eat 5 more and you can finish' cue a very upset boy and a loooooooong half an hour at the table. (he ate 3 pieces and then wouldn't eat the last 2)

Eventually he asked for some rice pudding, so Hubby said '2 more and you can' we took his plate full away and left he 2 pieces on his table. It wasn't until the Hubby left the table to get the rice pudding to use it as visual encouragement that I said 'quick eat them whilst daddy's gone' and he scoffed them both. Then ate about 2 spoonfuls of rice pudding.

I don't want to give him a fear of food or whatever it is they can get from being forced to eat when they don't want to. But at the same time I don't wish him to starve!!

So his total eating today: up at 7 napped. 1-3 and its now 6pm. He's eaten about 2 spoonfuls of shreddies, a banana, half a slice of toast, 2 hot dog sausages, 2 baby biscuits, an orange, about 10 pieces of pasta and a spoonful of rice pudding!

For new followers he's 2 and 3 months, he weighs about 2 stone (12kg?)

So do I stop the snacking and focus on the meals or just feed him what and when he wants and hope the phase passes like it normally does!?

Any advice would be gratefully received!!